My girlfriend is depressed and pushing me away and If you too have been dating someone experiencing depression, you may be unsure of what to do or say to help them feel better. More than 264 million people worldwide suffered from depression at some point. These can be people of all ages. Depression is a severe illness that can significantly burden the person who experiences it and those around them.
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Dating Someone with Depression
what to do when your girlfriend is depressed? In my case, she dated me for six months, and everything was going well. One day after a friend’s wedding, she told me she didn’t want to talk to anyone; no one in her family, our friends, could convince her otherwise. The next day she texted me that she was emotionally not in a good state of mind and needed a break from “us.” I had doubts that my girlfriend is depressed and pushing me away. So whenever someone asks me how to date someone with depression? Is my partner depression pushing me away
I answer, “I try not to take anything personally, but sometimes it hurts so much when I’m with her, and she’s so distant,” he admitted. “she’ll be so distant, and sometimes she’ll be nice and friendly with me; and then she’ll go back to being cold and distant again. In short, she’s pushing me away”.
Difference Between Sadness And Depression
How to help my girlfriend with depression?
By knowing the critical difference between sadness and depression will help ensure proper support and help.
While sadness is an emotion, depression is a mental illness.
Sadness leaves on its own, but depression requires treatment and professional help.
In sadness, one can go their usual way, but depression can destroy daily life and relationships.
Sadness has some particular event behind it, but with depression, no one cause exists.
Sadness doesn’t lead to sleepless nights depression may disrupt sleep and appetite.
Sadness mainly focuses on feelings of unhappiness or sorrow, but depression makes a person think about their worthlessness and hopelessness.
Signs You Have A Depressed Partner
- Change in sleeping habits
- Change in eating habits
- Low mood for most of the days
- Irritability
- Nothing seems interesting anymore that once made you excited
- Difficulty concentrating on things
- Lack of energy and motivation
- Feelings of numbness or unexplained guilt
- Suicidal thoughts or thoughts when you wished you could not wake up tomorrow
- Isolating, avoiding loved ones, and canceling plans you were looking forward to earlier.
- Negative feelings of shame or not being enough
- A decline in personal care
- Falling behind on household work
Depressed partners are constantly pushing people away as a defense mechanism for various reasons
- Like being alone
- Have no energy left for any relationships
- Embarrassment
- I feel like a burden to everyone
- Fear being hurt or hurting their partners. They fear disappointing others.
- Feeling valueless: depressed partner shuns others’ company because they are worthless.
How To Help My Girlfriend with Depression?
how do i deal with my girlfriends depression? I was wondering what to do when my partner is depressed. Therefore I researched the topic of ” My girlfriend is depressed and pushing me away” extensively and found out certain things that would help every partner of a depressed loved one.
- Being caring-It would help if you were careful that your girlfriend doesn’t get hurt and you don’t make her feel like she is a burden to you.
- Keep an eye on her moods -Be ready to listen to her whenever she decides to open up to you about her depressive thoughts about the cause behind her thought process. You should follow her lead in such conversations patiently.
- No judgement-Do not judge or order her around to do things like “go for a walk” or “you should work out.”
- Listen: Listening is important.
- Create a judgment-free environment: Don’t judge them when they speak their mind.
- Give space: Don’t smother your partner with overcare and excessive attention. Support them only when it’s needed and necessary.
- Don’t try to be a fixer– It’s not your job to fix it. You may get this urge to be a hero and save the damsel in distress but trust me; it’s not something you can fix.
- Get educated about depression– An empathetic partner will try to learn more about depression and then compassionately understand the partner and their experiences.
Read more about Do antidepressants affect intelligence?
What To Say When Someone You Love Is Depressed?
You’ll find your partner pushing away – even when depressed, negatively impacting everything else in their lives. All you need is to be empathetic and kinder in your responses.
1. I’m not leaving your side; we are together.
2. There is so much more to you than your mind reveals.
3. I don’t think you need to change yourself for me.
4. Your depression isn’t due to your weakness.
5. I’m proud of you for still being here- some days, surviving is enough.
6. It’s okay if you don’t want to talk; we can sit together till the storm passes.
What To Text To A Partner With Depression?
Wondering how do i deal with my girlfriends depression. here are some things you can text her to help her become strong.
- You can have your space; I will eagerly wait to see you once you feel better.
- We’re friends for life- whenever we fall, the other picks us up. Let me be there for you in these tough times.
- I love you, and nothing will ever change that.
- Don’t feel guilty for withdrawing and prioritizing your mental health.
- For me, you are enough the way you are.
Serious Signs To Look Out For If You Have A Depressed Girlfriend
If your girlfriend has depression, understanding these warning signs is very important.
- Mentioning death in conversations
- Obsessing about death
- Saying they want to commit suicide (even if they later say it was a joke) is not something to be brushed off.
- Making suicide plans
- Uttering phrases that they have had enough and would like to give up now or everyone will be relieved if she didn’t exist.
- She was suddenly moving from a depressed state of mind to peace and happiness without any explanation.
Can Depression Affect The Way You Love?
Couples living with depression experience significantly fewer positive interactions than those not living with the condition. It can make one partner feel like the other is rejecting them, even when they aren’t. Is my girlfriend is ruining my mental health?
Some experience depressive symptoms differently. For example, one person may be more withdrawn, and the other may be more talkative.
A romantic partner who lives with a person who is depressed experiences lower levels of relationship quality and intimacy than couples who do not live with a depressed person. However, the impact of living with a person who is depressed about how you love can be quite different. Some people respond to a partner’s depression by avoiding or minimizing their need for emotional support, while others react by seeking more intimate connections.
How to take care of Myself When My Girlfriend Is Depressed And Pushing Me Away?
Girlfriend’s depression killing relationship
Sometimes depressed partners can make you feel low yourself. The best thing you can do is try to be happy even when your girlfriend is acting depressed and pushing you away. It will help you both to feel better.
It is a long, draining, and frustrating journey when you have a girlfriend with depression, where you need to act and speak with care so that it doesn’t hurt your girlfriend while being true to yourself. If your girlfriend’s depression is becoming severe and thus taking a toll on your mental health, you can’t handle it. Taking care of yourself and breaking up until she feels better is not selfish.
Conclusion on My girlfriend is depressed and pushing me away
If you think you can’t handle everything and you are getting affected. You must see a therapist to discuss your emotions regarding your girlfriend with depression. You should reach out to your close friends (those who don’t judge), talk to them, and rant about whatever eases your mind. If your depressed friend stops talking, give them some time and space, so if my girlfriend is depressed and pushing me away.
I would observe if she has been acting depressingly for over a week. I would suggest she see a psychiatrist as soon as possible and find the proper medication. If you get angry at her for not being herself and feel overwhelmed by it, you need to step back and remind yourself that she has a severe condition and to be supportive of her, at least for a little while.
Don’t take your girlfriend pushing you away personally. Instead, try to remember that she is still suffering, and she may be acting in a not entirely genuine way to cope with her depression. It cannot be easy to see past your feelings when your girlfriend is distant, but if you try to be supportive and understanding, it will help you cope with her behavior.
Remember when your girlfriend gets depressed that it is an illness and not something that your girlfriend can control.. she is not weak or it’s not a personal failing. Avoid blaming or shaming each other for her mental state. The only way to overcome this is by being patient and understanding. Maybe she is deliberately picking fights with you, she may also become argumentative and critical about every action of yours but avoid getting defensive with her.
Remember this behavior of hers is not a reflection of how you are as a boyfriend or spouse it in no way defines your relationship. Don’t try to solve her problems or give unnecessary and unwanted advices to her.
FAQs on My girlfriend is depressed and pushing me away
- Can depression make you want to end your relationship?
People push other people away to avoid intimacy. It is a defence mechanism for not getting hurt in a relationship. This can also be due to some past relationships. This can also be due to their past relationship ending badly or getting heartbroken at some cruel rejection. - Why does my girlfriend push everyone away?
If your girlfriend pushes you away, it is because they are afraid of rejection. You should make them feel secure about your love and must talk to them about your relationship matters with them. However, keep this constant reassurance as it can backfire, too, sometimes. - Why does my partner push me away when they’re sad?
Maybe they don’t want their partner to see them in such a sorry state or feel sympathy for them. Sometimes a, depressed person just wants to be alone so that they don’t have to explain themselves to their partners. It is challenging for the loved ones to support, too, in such a situation where they don’t know how they should respond to depressed partners’ feelings.
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Dr Amit Sharma is a Doctor and writer with a particular interest in mental health. He helps individuals by combining practical advice with emotional support.